Thursday, March 4, 2010

Busy, Burdened....Beautiful




A time in the desert...Well, I am sure glad it didnt last 40 years, however 1 day in the desert seems like 40 years...Wilderness, desert, its all the same..Its dry, its desolate, lonely etc..You know what I mean...My desert experiences have been few but have impacted me in such a way that I'm not in a hurry to go back there....I am dry and thirsty Lord send your rain, send your rain...Lord I need your touch again, send your rain, send your rain...Let it rain, Let it fall from heaven , send your rain to revive my soul, I need your rain, I need your streams of refreshing, so i will thirst no more..Those are lyrics to a song that has stuck with me for 10 years..You know those songs that you never forget, or have impacted your life/walk in a way that you don't understand..That is the one that did it for me...My desert experience that remains fresh in my mind is the time I returned to the world...After serving the Lord for 6 years and I mean "serving"..I was busy, busy. busy..Youth, dance, children's ministry any thing that needed to be done I did it..I was going constantly and enjoyed every second of it..You know the desert thing kind of just crept up on me..One day I was going, going ,going the next day ...NOTHING...A lot in my life had transpired during this time, lots of changes..It all happened when a separation occurred between myself and my ministries and my church family...Its really not important these days how it happened as much as the importance of "why" it happened...This experience (desert) was the loneliest, darkest place I had ever been..Sometimes it was cold and desolate and others the temperature got so hot I was gasping for air...My emotions got the best of me in this place, I was sad, lonely, afraid, desperate etc....In this desert I spent some time in a fiery furnace, a lions den, in a pit, a prison I had faced many giants, a serpent had even spoken to me and tried to strangle the very breath of life out of me, I ran, I hid, then I cried out for help.....JESUS!!!!HELP ME..You know what He said that day....I've been here the whole time daughter, I was just waiting for you to ask...I was waiting for you to surrender to me , admit you couldn't do it on your own..I was waiting for you to call out my name...That day in the desert I finally had sensed a glimmer of hope..He told me to walk with Him for He had much to tell me in regards to this place I had been residing in for some time..After a long walk I told the Lord I was weary and didn't think I could continue this journey through this desert..At that moment he told me that we were on our way to the potters house, that it was just a little further along the narrow road we were on, I looked up at Him...I said I am to tired Lord this burden is to much, I cant take another step, I am dry and thirsty..At that moment He picked me up and carried me the rest of the way, I fell asleep as I counted His footprints in the sand..When I had finally came to, we were at the Potters house as he promised we would be..As I looked around I saw so many masterpieces some shiny , some cracked and some on the potters wheel..I asked Jesus my guide why are we here?? Am I going to return to the desert??..His reply was," No daughter, here is where I am going to teach you how to be fit for the masters use......."..You walked through the desert, you called on my name and now here we stand...Here is where You will sit,you will be molded and transformed into a vessel fit for "my" use...